First let me clarify I am sick and fat. I am sick because last month I was diagnosed with pre-diabetes. Can you imagine I have in the past thought that I would never have diabetes. I would never allowed myself to get to that point. You know maybe I should never say to myself that I will never be rich. That being rich will never happen to me. Maybe I should say that I will never be super fit and healthy. That more important than money that being healthy will never happen to me. So, after being sent to an endocrinologist I learned that genetically I am disposed to producing more insulin that I need. It had been happening for years undetected. He said " This is not your fault".
I know, I am repeating this story. Except that now my juicer has arrived. Wednesday I go to the market to buy my veggies. I am being brought back to my humiliation of last year. Back to when I thought I would diet and lose weight for Oxfam. You know what happens when you commit to something like that....you don't do that. I think it was the time that we had to move to Georgia. I was not really in a place to lose weight. Am I in a place in Georgia to lose weight? Well I think with the support of my posse at the gym and friends I think it might happen.
My goals ? I am sure that I might lose a lot of weight. I would like to have excellent cholesterol levels , rid of this metformin medication, and rid of the keratosis polaris I have on my face and arms. Is it my goal to juice for the rest of my life ? No, I am afraid that I will not be able to that. I think that I love chicken, pork, beef and breads far too much to give up. I am a believer of well rounded meals. So, this Fat, Sick and Nearly webpage has a few options and I will take the longest one. It's the 15 day plan and if I can I will do another 15 days.
I thought that if I blog about it for the first week that would be enough. I know the first 3 days will be absolute hell. I am also thinking that I will start the first 15 days juicing with protein and then strictly juicing. Also, I can talk about a plan forever, but I think that talking about it and doing it...that is the way to go.
I have a friend that I have a great deal of respect for. He is a man that is tall and thin. I don't think he has ever had an issue with food or obesity in his life. He can eat whatever he wants and never have think twice about it. He of course is a man and generally men don't have emotional eating issues. They don't feel like if they don't have a particular food they get grumpy. They don't feel deprived. I don't think I have ever had that feeling EVER. Anyway, he is just one of those people that says," I am going to do this". He just does it. I am sure that he has plans on retirement and will do exactly as planned. I don't think he allows anyone or anything to get in his way. Wow if I could only do that !!
Anyway, if you read this....just pray for me. I wish I had a friend that could be there for me for the first three days. A friend that I could just keep me busy and happy for those first three days. It's just not how life is. It's unrealistic and unreasonable. Then again when have I been either of those on any given day ? Just pray that I don't give up. I give up so easy when it comes to me and my self worth and being good to me. Right now I am off to the American Girl Store taking the girls out to dinner at the cafe....blah !
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