So, I got up today...cranky. I forgot what I was dreaming about. Maybe working at Crate and Barrel. I worked there for about a year once. Maybe a little over a year. I dream I go back there and work. I think because I was really unhappy working there and want to go back with a more positive experience. Just like I dream about returning to High School and retake all the classes I was taking..and suddenly I forget my locker combination. I dream of returning to my past to the moments that I really think I blew it. I always dream of fixing things. I wake up a little more frustrated then when I get to bed.
Anyway, I get up out of bed and go down stairs and eat some cereal (evil) and down a cup of coffee from yesterday ( totally nasty) read the news and then head up and get ready for the museum. I had two tours planned to today...4th graders. The tours went a little longer than planned...and there were a lot of kids. So, my group of 22 ended up using the stairs and walking up to the 4th Floor. I was slightly breathless, but what irritated me the most ? Sweating....oh my gosh ? Why did the Lord bless me with this baby fine thin hair that is going grey ? Why is that I sweat first from my head first ? Its the curse that has lasted my entire life time. So, despite what shape I am...I sweat profusely...except in cold. Thus my great desire to live in Finland, Sweden, Greenland, Denmark etc. Yes, I will always have the great desire to live in England, but you know...the chances of me returning to the land of my ancestors...next to NULL. So, you know what is next ? Possibly Montana ?
Yes, as soon as I got up to my first piece I start sweating. Like it's making the front of my cotton v neck slightly wet and my hair ? My short fine hair is soaked. I have no bandanna...no towel...nothing to comfort me from the embarrassment I am experiencing. Just some pieces of binder paper in my bag. Trying to and unsuccessfully fanning the sweat from my entire neck up. The tour went well and I think the kids really really liked it, but as for me I ran into the bathroom to check out the damage. Oh, it was bad, it was really really bad. I looked in the mirror and I had no hair...the hair I did have...it looked like I was missing hair. It's the gray. My mother despises my dark hair, but if I have grey...I am going to look bald for the rest of my freaking life. So I run out making drama to my boss about how unhappy and embarrassed I am.
It's not only do I feel like a fat piece of crap in the outfit I am wearing, but on top of that I am sweating...sweating like an obese pig. Okay, so perhaps I am being hard on myself, but I am sick and tired of this sweating. I mean if I get botox on my head...what will happen to the sweat ..where will the sweat go ? Will I sweat from my butt ? Will I sweat from under my arms ? I know that sweating is a wonderful thing and that I should be grateful that I am providing a great service to children, and also releasing my body from toxins...but really. I admire women that have lots and lots of hair...they complain and they have no idea what I am going through...sometimes...sometimes I want to pull an Susan Powter and just shave it all off ....
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