Dear Academy Awards : So sorry I missed you last night...well actually not really. I did see Dallas Buyers Club and that is all I needed of the Academy Awards. No, I take that back ! I did miss Benedict Cumberbatch. Yeah...I missed him...
Dear Twins: Can I tell you how much "I" am enjoying your book reports ? It was fun making posters of Harriet Tubman and Rosa Parks. Now, as you get older...when will I be able start doing your science fair projects ?
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| dude Top Gun was the 80's !! |
Dear Rah Rah: I am delighted DELIGHTED that cotillion is over and done with. I think I learned more about manners than you did. So, when do you think you'll be having to waltz or foxtrot in public ? Do you think that they use those dances at The White House ? Buckingham Palace ? The Kremlin ? Putin does not appear to be the type to foxtrot...maybe Polka..yeah definitely Polka.
Dear Dr. B: I think your staff is horrible. I think that you need to have better printing skills and I think your evil charging parking and make me come in your office all the time. YOU are the reason I was stuck in my car for 10 hours. The only thing have going for you is that you are good at what you do....poor Gretchie Love.
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| I have no idea what this picture is about...no corn in GA ? |
Dear God: I am looking out my window and it's wet and yucky and gloomy. This is my fear...that this summer is going to SUCK. That it's either going to be raining like crazy, 100+ degrees with 100 percent humidity and like 10 tornado alerts. That spring is going to be a flash and I won't have time to smell the flowers :( So could you not make that happen. If this is the case, could you possibly send me to London on accident. Like some man that is loaded (and repulsive) needs a tour guide and he chooses me because he is half blind.
Dear Gretchie Love: The Life You Should Be Leading: a) You should not be eating any processed food. I am aware this is the you start your morning, but STOP IT !!! Cereal is crap !!! It doesn't matter if you are eating high fiber cereal...its crap STOP EATING PROCESSED FOOD !! b) You need to return to the gym and you need to start to do yoga on at least 3 times a week. Stop using your painfully sore Achilles tendon as an excuse. Keep your mind out of the gutter . Now you may interpret that statement however you want. However, my gutter does not involve sex or drugs...so sorry to break your freaking bubble...C) Clean your house please...it looks like crap. Just throw all the clutter away and you'll be much happier. D) Stop worrying about the museum. Just do it. Just pretend like you know your stuff. Just for once pretend you have HIGH self esteem with guts of glory. Just pretend you have the arrogance and cockiness of a pretend Spaniard. You know...you rule the world, you are awesome, you are fabulous, and you can do this...Wait..wait wait wait...I am awesome and fabulous. I just lack that arrogant confidence the Pretend Spaniard has.
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| it could be him... |
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| okay, he could be related to this guy based on this skin tone and long face, but its not him... |
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| Oh it TOTALLY could be him.. |
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| actually if your mind is in the gutter this could be very inappropriate, but I am just thinking TACO BELL |
Okay Gretchie Verse: Before you go off on Who is the Pretend Spaniard ....please know that this Spaniard is pretend. He's Pretend and he's tall and dark and handsome...and possibly between the ages of 22-35. So, if you are thinking that this "pretend Spaniard" exists you are wrong. I know how you people think...to you I say BLAH
I am off to a glorious day at Sams and cleaning my house. Yep that is all that I am doing..that's all ! Au Revior, Auf Weidersehen, Ciao, Bye, etc. etc. etc.
2 comments:
Gretch, your are a treasure. Don't forget that. There for SURE is only one you, and you keep us entertained.
Gretch, your are a treasure. Don't forget that. There for SURE is only one you, and you keep us entertained.
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