The Ass Gasket

Seriously, whoever invented the toilet seat cover is a genius. Why ? Because I just find them to be TOTALLY useless !! Today, was a beautiful day. I was trying to think what I did ... oh yeah, cleaned house, did some laundry, 2 loads of dishes, pureed my baked pumpkin, and read the rest of "The Host". Did not care for the ending of "The Host"..really who makes alien abduction into a romance ?  Anyway, dying to get out the house T and I went looking for maps. I am going to NYC and DC soon and needed to get some maps. I find maps on my iPhone TOTALLY useless. Sorry Mr. Jobs (RIP) but walking briskly down 5th Avenue NYC and trying to read a map...not my cup of tea.

Back to my toilet seat cover. I'm at Barnes and Noble and using the public bathroom. I look down at the toilet. The person before me apparently flushed, but the toilet seat cover did not. Was I shocked ? So, flushed the cover down the drain. Toilet water flails everywhere and I put my sheet of wax paper down to protect my ass from any infectious diseases on the seat. The paper sticks...I sit down...the paper sticks to me...I sit up to find the seat cover stuck to my ass. I am not happy. This of course never happens to skinny people. In my mind skinny people ....nothing every happens to them :) So, peel it off my ass flush it down the toilet and wait for the next victim. I have decided to take a picture of the toilet seat cover dispenser because I am so pissed about it I needed to blog about it. Yes, the person who invented it is a genius. 

Wikipedia's Take on The Toilet Seat Cover...ROCK ON !!!
A toilet seat cover (colloquially called an ass-gasket) is a disposable piece of paper shaped like the toilet seat itself that can be placed on the seat by its user. Its purpose is to protect the toilet's user from germs that may be resting on the seat,^[1] though scientific studies have cast doubt on the cover's value.